Thursday, October 8, 2009

Complimentary Bits and Bobs

"There is no effect more disproportionate to its cause than the happiness bestowed by a small compliment." -Robert Brault

"The soul is healed by being with children." -Fyodor Dostoevsky


Today was a wonderful day. It's not been particularly productive academically, but I've had a lot of fun and I'm feeling very happy. And when I'm happy, I want everybody to be happy!

Which, granted, is on the difficult/impossible side. But at the very least I can resolve to give compliments more generously. Brault's right in the quote above; a small compliment does so much to improve a bad day, to put a golden note on a good day, and to give a little boost through life--mainly because an unexpected compliment doesn't only say "hey, nice shirt," or "pretty hair!" or "you're so reliable, I love that about you!" It says that the person giving the compliment bothered to notice something about you, spent a second or so thinking about specifically you, and deemed you worthy to receive their opinion, or was trying to make you feel good. That's important; it makes you feel special and included.

For example, this morning after my 8-9:40, my friend Mary Kate complimented me not on my sweater, which I'd haphazardly thrown on because I was getting dressed in the dark, and knew it to be simple and warm (necessary, since it was 45 degrees this morning), but on the color of my sweater, which I had never particularly thought about before (it's a bright royal blue). It's a little thing, but that she would notice and comment on such a thing made me smile and ratcheted my mood up a notch.

Then, about half an hour later, after a trip to Target (which wins points for quality and ease of shopping experience, but positively FAILS at actually having exactly what you want, like a phone charger that fits your phone or any fruits/vegetables at all) and a significant amount of time spent singing Taylor Swift with all the windows down, I walked into Walmart, my hair messy from the wind, and the first things I saw were two little girls. Sisters or friends, I'm not sure, but about five or six, holding hands and people-watching while their mom/whoever checked out. I happen to love little girls, still being one at heart, and so I grinned at them as I walked by. Didn't matter to me if they noticed me smiling at them or not. However, they did, and as I passed, the taller of the two tugged the other one's hand, pointed at me, and said "Look, a pretty girl!"

They can talk about how a new haircut or well-cut pair of jeans makes you feel like a million dollars all they want; personally, I don't think a better way has ever been invented to make a person feel amazing. Especially since young children tend to be brutally honest. Doesn't that sort of thing just pick you up?

So, I've decided to make an effort to drop more complimentary bits and bobs every day. (Caveat: only when I mean them, of course.) I think tomorrow I'll tell Lora how pretty her hair is, because it's something I always notice and never say anything about.

Anyway, that's about it...just me spouting off nonsense again!

3 comments:

Rachel said...

I think you are amazing! So happy you had a wonderful day....

The Canine Scholar said...

Katherine,

What a lovely post! My computer did some weird thing at 12:01 last night all on it's own, and visited sites I'd not been to in a while and there were there when I went to my history trying to find out where I thought I was only to find your blog. I agree ... there goes a pretty girl!

Love, Alice in Wonderland err ... your Aunt Brett

PS looking forward to seeing you next week!

Aunt Tonnye said...

The world needs more people like you! It is those little things that make the world a bright place rather than a dull dark and insensitive place! You go, girl!